Hair Clip
by HoneyFlower15
Summary: Their time spent together before the war and even after. Hitsugaya is still growing and wonders if he has the right to still love Hinamori or if he should remain her "Shiro-chan". A HitsuHina fluff story of love, friendship, and growth.
1. Chapter 1

" _I swear I'll never understand how they became seated officers."_ Hitsugaya Toshiro, the prodigy of the Seireitei, youngest to ever graduate from the academy, and wielder of the most powerful ice type Zanpakuto was left confused and annoyed because of today's events. He felt his one eye twitch as he stood in the middle of the shopping district, arms crossed and that ever-present frown on his face as he watched his captain and lieutenant run around like morons.

"Look at this Shiba-Taichou!" Rangiku cried out, beckoning the older man to come and join her at one of the stalls.

"Ooh, that's a good find. Great job!" Isshin exclaimed, rocking back and forth on his toes.

Hitsugaya all but growled in annoyance at the two supposed adults. Everyone always said he was the kid of the Tenth Division, but his two superiors were the childish ones in his mind.

"Toshiro, come over here. This stand has some great stuff." His captain called out to him, casually using his first name like he always did, but he refused to move from his spot. He was not going to participate in their mindless shopping spree when they should be doing work.

The day had started like any other. Matsumoto was running all around the barracks trying to find their captain and when she did finally track him down they two had argued about the workload. Neither one of them was very fond of doing paperwork and always tried to avoid it. He had been left inside the office, organizing the files that needed to be handled right away and cataloging the reports of recent Hollow sighting and attacks. He had gotten used to the two commanding officers bickering on a daily basis, so he quickly tuned them out to focus on his work. It was only when his captain came charging into the office, exclaiming that he and Matsumoto had to join him on an urgent mission that he finally lost focus on the paperwork. Hitsugaya had followed without question after his captain and lieutenant, but when they ended up in the shopping district, his apprehension began to surface. He saw no signs of a disturbance; instead, he saw many of their fellow Shinigami all out and about, acting as though they didn't have a care in the world. He had tried to speak up, to voice his thoughts and protests, but before he could even get a single word out the two took off. He was left there, standing in the dust and feeling baffled by what he just experienced.

"Taichou, these sales are amazing!" Rangiku exclaimed, her bags of items already starting to pile up by her feet.

"I know, right!" Isshin was as thrilled about the sales as she was. He had nowhere as near as many bags as she did but his was slowly growing. "When I heard about these great sales there was no way I could miss out on it."

He may have been bewildered before but that was at the start of this stupid shopping trip, and now he was just plain annoyed. They were spending their time shopping when they should be working. Hitsugaya did his best to keep his reitasu in check, although the temptation to freeze over the two was very strong. He couldn't believe this. His captain, the man who is supposed to be their leader, dragged them out to go shopping all because sales were going on. He was supposed to set an example for the squad. But all he was doing was proving that it was okay to slack off. Rangiku was no better. The only reason she worked so hard to drag their captain back to the office was so that he would do the work she didn't want to do. Most days they ended up fighting about who would stay late to finish up the work that they should have been doing all day. But right now they were acting like the best of friends who have never fought in their life. They had been jumping from stall to stall for the last hour, and Hitsugaya's had enough. He did not consider shopping during a once-in-a-lifetime sale a mission. _"This is stupid,"_ with a huff he turned around and headed back towards the office.

"Hold it!"

Or he tried to. His captain had appeared directly in front of him, cutting off his route to leave this dreaded place behind.

"And just where do you think you're going, young man?" Isshin crossed his arms over his chest in a mocking manner as he grinned down at the young boy.

Hitsugaya rolled his eyes at this. His captain was always trying to act "fatherly" towards him and their others in the division, but it was hard to take him seriously as an adult when he acts the way he does. "I'm going back. There's work that needs to be handed in by the end of the day."

Isshin scoffed at this, "Toshiro, you need to learn how to relax. You should be enjoying your youth and get out more." he patted the young boy on the head in a playful manner.

Hitsugaya felt his eye twitch as he kept his anger in check. He absolutely hated it when people would pat him on the head.

"Taichou, is right," Rangiku walked up next to him, multiple bags underneath her arms as she snacked on some dumpling she got from a nearby sweet store. "You're turning into an old man. Try having some fun once in a while."

Slapping the hand off his head, Hitsugaya rolled his eyes at the two. "Unlike, the two of you I don't have any interest in shopping for crap I don't need just because it's on sale."

Isshin staggered back, "So harsh," he whimpered, pouting slightly to try and get some sympathy from his third seat. All he got was a blank stare. "You may think that now but you may find something very special in this sale."

Hitsugaya had enough of this and slowly started to walk off. "I doubt it," he waved them off, not bothering to listening to what his captain was saying.

"You never know, you might be able to find a lovely present for Lieutenant Hinamori!" Isshin grinned, a knowing look on his face at the boy's reaction.

Hitsugaya staggered in his retreat. His face twisted into a deep frown as he slowly turned back around to face his captain. "What the hell are you going on about?" he all but growled out, gritting his teeth together.

The boy tried his best to suppress it, but Isshin still saw it. The faint dusting of pink that now coated his two cheeks. Usually, Hitsugaya wears the same blank expression on his face every day but when Isshin has learned that if you talk about specific topics, you can get some interesting reactions out of the boy. It hadn't taken him long to pick up on these subtle changes, but he always made sure to keep an eye out for them. "You know what I mean. Girls love it when you give them gifts, and I bet Lieutenant Hinamori will be so happy if you showed up at her doorstep with a present just for her." he waggled his eyebrows, his grin growing in size with each word he spoke. He looked at his Lieutenant, signaling her to assist him.

Rangiku didn't need to be told twice. "Taichou is right about Hinamori-chan being happy if you gave her a present but there is so much more to it than that. Getting the gift is only the first part, the rest is how you present yourself and it to her," Brushing her hands through her short strawberry locks she readjusted her hair until it resembled Hitsugaya's. From there she got down on her knees and held out her last stick of dumplings. "Hinamori, please accept this gift that I have chosen especially for you." she lowered her voice, trying to make it sound like Hitsugaya's. She had a blank expression on her face and attempted to keep her eyes sharp like his as well.

Isshin quickly joined her act. "Ooh, Shiro-chan, I'm so happy. It's so thoughtful of you to think of me." He couldn't fix his appearance to resemble that of Hinamori, but he did his best to act like the girl. Or the extreme version of her. He clasped his two hands together as he shook his hips side to side. An excited smile on his face as he happily squealed at the fake present being given to him.

Rangiku made a soft noise, one that Hitsugaya often makes when he's happy, and grinned exactly like the young boy. "Of course, my dear. I'm always thinking of you." She grabbed one of her captain's hands, interlocking their fingers and her teeth seemed to twinkle as she grinned.

"Oh, Shiro-chan," Isshin's voice if possible was even more high pitched than before. He was even blushing now. "How romantic."

Hitsugaya almost couldn't believe what he was watching. His captain and lieutenant were acting like complete and utter fools and in public no less. What made matters worse was that they were pretending to be him and Hinamori and they had attracted a crowd. He sucked in his lips; utterly embarrassed as he looked around the open area and saw the many spectators they two had caught. His cheeks were now pink for a whole other reason. He mentally cursed when he recognized a few faces of fellow Shinigami watching the two put on their act. Some of them were even in Hinamori's division. He could only hope that none of them reported this to her. If they did, he wasn't sure if he would be able to face the young peach girl any time soon.

He was torn now. He really wanted to tell the two to stop. They were still spouting nonsense and pretending to be the two childhood friends despite the many people who were watching them. He speculated that they were probably enjoying the attention. But there was a part of him that just wanted to get the hell out of there. If anyone did tell Hinamori about the two acting this way, then he could at least deny being there and say they had just gotten drunk after a day of shopping. That seemed less embarrassing than her finding out he was there while they acted this way.

Taking in a deep breath, he flash stepped away. He didn't look back to his captain or lieutenant and ran as far away as he could. He cringed when he saw how big the crowd had gotten and how they two seemed to lay the act on even harder now. They were really getting into their little performance. _"Don't they have any shame?"_ Hitsugaya shook his head, ducking into an empty alley to catch his breath. He had used more energy then he intended too, and it had shocked his system. _"At least things have quieted down."_ He was glad that he had managed to get far enough away that he could no longer hear the two. Running one hand through his white locks he mentally groaned, trying to think of how he would face Hinamori if their behavior did get back to her. Even if he did make up some lie about them being drunk, it would still be embarrassing for him to face her after that. He did not doubt that this would be the talk of the entire Seireitei. He could only hope they didn't publish the display in the paper. "Those idiots, don't they have any common sense." He grumbled to himself. The two were always teasing him about his relationship with Hinamori, and he's repeatedly told them not to get involved. What happened between him and the girl was nobody else's business. Besides, their way of helping was nothing more than meddling and it usually only made things worse for him.

Inhaling a deep breath through his nose and exhaling out his mouth he felt his nerves calm down. He was nowhere near where the crowd was, so that was a good thing. Leaving the empty alleyway, he saw that he was in a part of the shopping district that was less crowded than the main area. There weren't as many shops around and even fewer people. For that he was grateful. This meant he could get back to work sooner without any more distractions.

 _ **Crash**_

Or so he thought. Looking over to the side he frowned when he saw two Soul Reapers bump into a small stall. They were obviously inebriated by the way they were behaving. They didn't even seem to realize they had caused any damage to the store. A small elderly woman had appeared, trying to talk with the two men but they ignored her and continued to dance around drunkenly fashion. Hitsugaya didn't recognize the two men, they weren't in the same division as him, but that didn't mean he couldn't teach them some manners.

"Hey you two!" he called out to them, stopping them in their little dance. Crossing his arms and glared up at the two. Even from where he stood he could smell the booze on them. "You knocked into this woman's shop. Apologize and help clean up this mess."

Him ordering them around did not sit well with the two.

"What you say, shortie?"

"As if we're going to listen to a brat like you."

Them calling him those names did not sit well with Hitsugaya. He was already in a bad mood because of his captain's and lieutenant's embarrassing antics; these two were only adding to his temper. "What was that?" he glared at the two, unleashing a small portion of his powers so that a cold breeze blew past and surrounded them.

The two drunken Shinigami instantly sobered up. They squealed in fear as they took in the overwhelming reiatsu of the young boy. Both of them swore the spiritual essence around him formed a dragon that was growling at them both. "We're sorry!" they cried as they ran away.

"Hey, get back here!" Hitsugaya yelled out but it was too late, they had run too far to hear him. "Idiots," he shook his head and kneeled down to pick up the few trinkets that had fallen when the two men had bumped into the stall.

"Arigato," The older woman, bent down next to him, picking up the remaining pieces. "I appreciate you doing that."

Hitsugaya didn't say anything, only nodding his head as he continued to pick everything up. He looked at the woman, she was younger than his grandmother and seemed to shy away from him slightly. Her hands shook softly as she picked up the discarded items. Was it because of her age or because of him? He took notice that she was picking up the pieces that were furthest away from him. Even in the Soul Society others still seemed wary of him. Pushing the thought away he focused back on task. The stall the men had bumped into was now crooked, and he doubted it would be stable enough to use now. He would have to remember to look up the two in the database so he can send a bill to the correct squad so that they can pay for the damage. This store seemed to sell accessories; he was picking up mostly hairpins with a few earrings and bracelets here and there. They weren't anything glamorous; the designs were rather ordinary so he could understand why the shop wasn't as busy as the rest. Many of the girls he's encountered seemed to prefer things that were shiny.

He stopped when he picked up a single hair clip. The accessory was simple, a gold clip with a small turquoise ribbon that tied in the center of the clip. It matched perfectly with his Zanpakuto. He felt his heart skip a beat when he imaged this clip nestled in shiny raven locks and the beaming smile that would come with it.

"You can have it if you like," the older woman brought him out of his daydream. "Take it as a token of my appreciation."

He shook his head quickly. "No, please I couldn't do that." He tried handing the clip back, but the woman refused.

"Nonsense, I want you to have it. It's the least I can do for all your help," she stood up, the accessories they had picked up now resting in her arms. She smiled down kindly at the young boy. "Besides, I can tell that you have someone special in mind for that hair clip," she had stepped inside the shop.

Hitsugaya stood up on his two feet, looking down at the small clip in his hands. He gulped down the emotions he was feeling when he imagined how it would look on Hinamori. Shaking his head once more he cursed at the way his cheeks heated up. This is all because of his captain and lieutenant and the way they were acting before. They had put that pointless idea in his mind about surprising Hinamori with a present and how she would act. Although he didn't dislike the idea of giving her the gift. No doubt her reaction would be over the top. She'd probably smile at him wide enough to make her cheeks hurt. He felt his lips twitch at the thought of her doing that.

The shop woman stepped back out, a light blue cloth in her hands. "Here we go," taking the clip she wrapped it up, making it look presentable as a gift.

"Thank you," he held the small pouch in his hands. "Please, let me pay you for this."

"Nonsense," she waved him off once more. "Consider this my payment towards you helping me." She didn't give him a chance to argue and returned to her shop.

Hitsugaya was left standing out in the streets once more. The older woman was wary of him in the beginning, but it seemed like she warmed up to him. Enough to give him this hair clip for free. He had to admit that he was a little embarrassed about this whole thing but there was a small part of him that was glad about how things turned out. Looking down at the blue pouch he felt the tip of his lips twitch up into a small smile. _"I wonder what Hinamori will say when I give this to her?"_ a jolt of excitement coursed through him as he thought of his childhood friend and the reaction that she would give when he presented her with this gift. It certainly would be a surprise. Her birthday wasn't coming up, and neither were any of the holidays. He would never admit it out loud, but maybe those two had a point. It might not be such a bad thing to give Hinamori a gift for no apparent reason. This could help him show her just how much she truly meant to him.

Safely tucking the gift inside his robes, he began his trek back to the barracks and headed for the Fifth Division. It didn't take him very long to reach his destination, he only ran into a handful of Shinigami, and many stayed to themselves. The usually bustling barrack was nearly deserted. It appeared that his captain and lieutenant were not the only ones spending the day shopping. But now was not the time to think about them. Pushing thoughts of what happened earlier today he took in a deep breath as he stood outside the Fifth Division office. The hair clip wrapped up in the light blue cloth was nestled in his robes, only the tips of the fabric sticking out. He gulped down the nerves that suddenly appeared and knocked softly. "Pardon the intrusion. It's third seat, Hitsugaya Toshiro, of the Tenth Division. May I enter?"

It took only a moment for him to receive a reply. "Please come in, Hitsugaya."

Opening the doors to the office, Hitsugaya gave a polite bow to the captain. "Kon'nichiwa Aizen-taichou."

Aizen looked up from his desk, a gentle smile on his face. "Kon'nichiwa, I hope you are having a good day so far," Placing his brush down he readjusted himself so that he was facing the young boy. "Is there something I can help you with?"

Hitsugaya did his best to keep his face neutral. A quick glance around the room showed him that it was only the two of them in the office. His lips twitched in a slight frown, but he stopped himself from pouting. "Is Lieutenant Hinamori in?" he did his best to hide his disappointment of her not being in the room at the moment. As well as his anxiety. The more time passed, the more he was starting to get nervous.

Aizen studied the young boy carefully. His eyes looking at the bits of light blue fabric that was sticking out in the middle of his robes. He offered the white-haired prodigy a kind smile. "I'm afraid Hinamori-kun just stepped out but she should be coming back shortly."

Hitsugaya nodded but didn't say anything. He was at a loss now. He had come here in hopes of seeing his old friend, but she wasn't there. It felt too awkward just to stay there and wait for her. "I see," his inwardly sighed. "Thank you for your time." He bowed to the man and moved towards the door. He would just track down the girl after hours.

"Aizen-taichou, I'm back." Almost as if fate was working in his favor Hinamori appeared just as he was about to open the door. She stood before him; her brown eyes widened slightly with confusion before gleaming with joy. "Hitsugaya-kun, it's so good to see you."

Take aback at her sudden appearance he stepped back and cleared his throat. "Hey," he looked away, trying his best to hide the light pink hue that dusted over his cheeks. He hadn't expected her to show up suddenly or to have her face so close to his.

Hinamori giggled at his reaction. Some things never change. "What are you doing here?" shutting the door behind her, she stepped into the office and offered a bow to her captain. She beamed when he smiled at her.

This didn't go unnoticed by Hitsugaya, and he resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Although he would have preferred to give this to her alone, he had to get back to his division and do the work that his captain and lieutenant wouldn't do. "I just wanted to-!" he had been reaching for the gift. His hands barely brushed over the soft fabric of the cloth that held the hair clip when he finally took in her appearance. When she first showed up at the door he had been caught off guard, his focus on her face. Now as he stood there, taking her full appearance, he sucked in a harsh breath. "What happened to you?" he felt his heart squeeze at the sight of the bandaged wrapped around her head. Her shoulder-length raven hair was tied in a low ponytail, but with the bandages wrapped around her forehead it made the top part of her hair puff out, and a few locks were coming out of the hair tie that tied her hair together.

Hinamori smiled faintly, she had a feeling he would react this way. "I'm fine Shiro-chan. My last mission was just a little more intense than I originally thought it was going to be." She reassured him, hoping to put some of his worries to rest. Ever since they were children, he's always been such a worrywart when it came to her and getting injured.

Ignoring the nickname she continued to call him, despite promising to stop, he felt some relief in knowing that she was fine, but her getting hurt never sat well with him. He couldn't stop the thought from forming in his head that if he had been there then maybe he could have prevented her from getting hurt. He was happy in the Tenth Division, but there was a small part of him that wished the two of them could be in the same squad together. At least then he had a better chance of protecting her.

"Hinamori-kun, lead a team of new recruits into the forests in the Rukongai when a group of Hollows attacked them. She proved her capabilities as a Lieutenant by defeating a majority of them and helped everyone returned in one piece. Save for a few bumps and bruises." Aizen stood up, walking over to the two childhood friends and placed a gentle hand on his lieutenant's head. He flashed her a warm smile as he smoothed out her hair.

Hinamori beamed at the praise he gave her. Hearing his kind words, experiencing these gestures from him were the main reason why she worked so hard to become the Vice-Captain of the Fifth Division.

Hitsugaya had to look away. A dense hollow feeling began to build up in his chest as he watched the two. He felt like he had been pushed to the side and all it took was a few simple words. Frowning to himself he placed a hand over the gift in his clothes and cleared his throat quietly. "Hinam-"

"We are just lucky that Hinamori-kun wasn't wearing any hair accessories at the time or else this head injury might have been serious," Aizen added softly, removing his hand from the young girl's head.

The words the older man spoke were kind, but it felt as though they had slapped Hitsugaya in the face. His hand gripped the center of his clothes, right where he kept the hair clip hidden. If he had given this to Hinamori earlier and she had worn it, then it would have been his fault if that indeed had happened. She could have suffered a more severe injury because of his gift. The thought of it sent bile up in his throat, but he forced down the burning liquid. The last thing he wanted in this world was her hurt. He made a vow to protect her, and he never wanted to do anything that could cause her any harm.

"Hitsugaya-kun," Hinamori calling to him brought him out of his thoughts. He pushed back the dark thoughts away as he focused on the girl in front of him. "Was there something you needed?"

He opened his mouth, his hand still gripping the center of his uniform to hide away the present. He couldn't give this to her now. Not after seeing her hurt like this and the fear he now felt. "I was just wondering if you wanted to go get lunch together." He mumbled, suddenly feeling rather small. Only this feeling had nothing to do with his height.

She smiled at him, pleased with the suggestion. "I would love too," she turned her full attention back to her captain and the smile she offered him was different from the one she gave to Hitsugaya. "I'll be taking my break now, Aizen-taichou."

He offered his nod of approval and smiled at the two childhood friends. "Have a good time you two." He waved to the two as they left his office.

Hitsugaya returned the gesture but with not nearly enough enthusiasm as his friend. His frown deepened when he saw the way she waved goodbye to her captain. He could slowly feel his mood worsening with every passing second.

"It's really rare for you to invite me out to eat. Usually, I'm the one dragging you away to get out of the office. I swear with how hard you work it's almost like you're the captain of the Tenth Division." She giggled, thinking of the happy-go-lucky pair that headed the division. Although she has only met the two officers on a few occasions, it was clear to see that they had more fun goofing off than working. It was a big contrast to her white-haired friend who was always very serious.

With a shrug of his shoulders, he crossed his arms, making sure to position his hand to keep blocking the light blue cloth that continued to stick out of his uniform. "We can't all have captains like Aizen." He grumbled.

Hinamori let out a dreamy sigh. "You're right; he is one of a kind."

Hearing how she spoke of him, seeing how she acted just by thinking of, witnessing the change in her demeanor because of the mere mention of the man sent an emotion through him that he had grown accustomed to over these last few years. He had to look away, his lips twitching to sink down into a deep frown but he bit down on them and did his best to keep his face neutral. Even when it was just the two of them, she was always thinking of her captain. It unnerved him more than he was willing to admit. He bitterly thought back to when he was still living with his Obaa-chan and she would return home from school and would only talk about the captain. Even then all her attention had been on the older man, and it would appear nothing has changed. She was still completely enamored with the man. There was a part of him that hoped she would be impressed with all of his accomplishes but everything he did seemed to pale in comparison to the oh-so-perfect Aizen.

"By the way, Hitsugaya-kun," the boy merely grunted, his gaze far away as he stared straight ahead. His focus was elsewhere. "What have you been trying to hide in your uniform this whole time?"

That caught his attention. "W-What?" he stopped in his tracks, unconsciously trying to cover up the blue fabric even more than before but that only made it more evident that he was hiding something.

"There," she pointed to the center of his chest where he gripped at the fabric of his clothes. "You've been trying to hide it since I entered the office. What is it?" she tried to pry his hand away, but he stepped away. "Shiro-chan!" she pouted, annoyed that he was being difficult.

"It's nothing. Just forget about it." He could feel himself blushing, but from what he wasn't quite sure. He didn't have time to focus on that though. He saw the look in Hinamori's eyes, and he knew she wasn't going to let this go until she found out what he was trying to hide. The two of them were in the middle of the road, her reaching out to try, and grab whatever it was he was hiding and he continued to step out of her reach.

Hinamori frowned, starting to get fed up with this little game. She didn't understand what the big deal was. Why was he putting up such a fight? She was really curious now what it was that he was hiding from her. He wasn't scolding her for using his nickname, so that meant it was something important enough for him to dismiss the name he claimed to hate. An idea popped into her head, and she grinned. Stopping in her assault, she looked over his shoulder and waved. "Kon'nichiwa, Shiba-taichou." Her grin widened in size when she saw him turn around to look. With quick reflects she reached out to grab the item.

She may have more experience than him, but he had raw talent. He mentally scolded himself for falling such a juvenile trick, and after he realized he didn't sense his captain's reiatsu, he quickly realized what her goal was. Reacting swiftly he grabbed hold of her wrist just as she pulled at the blue cloth in his robes. They stood there for a moment, both slightly panting from the speed they had been using in their little game. Hitsugaya felt his heart thud in his chest as his eyes landed on her hand, the tips of her fingers were grasping the thin ribbon that tied the blue cloth together. If he had been a second too late, it would have fallen out, and she would have seen it. Pushing her hand away he turned around so that all she could see was his back.

"Shiro-chan!" Hinamori pouted, her cheeks puffed out in annoyance.

Ignoring his dreaded nickname once more he looked at the small blue cloth in his hand. The band was just starting to come undone, and the tips of the gold hair clip shinned in the sun. He gulped at the sight, his heart beating faster than he would have liked. Before he had entered the office, this would have been the ideal situation for him. He wanted it just to be the two of them when he gave it to her but after seeing her injuries, hearing what Aizen said he wasn't sure if he should. Their line of work was dangerous, and as she developed in skills, she would be going out on much more dangerous missions. She would always be at risk of getting injured. Clenching the hand down at his side into a fist he made up his mind. Carefully he clipped the accessories to his white shitagi inside his black robes, making sure that it was out of sight and the outline couldn't be seen. Only then did he turn around to face the girl. Clearing his throat, he offered her the blue cloth. "Fine, but don't complain when I don't give you anything for your birthday."

"My birthday?" she tilted her head to the side, clearly confused. Her birthday was months away.

He frowned, his cheeks taking on a faint pink look. "Shiba-taichou dragged me to the shopping district because of the sales going on. I saw this haircloth being sold and figured I'd get it now since it's on sale." It was such a lie. A complete and total lie. He felt foolish for even saying it but what else could he say? He didn't feel like he could give her the original gift he wanted to, and she wouldn't leave him alone until he showed her what he was hiding. This was the only thing he could think of.

The confused look on her face was quickly replaced with a cheerful one. Letting out a delighted squeal she reached forward and clenched the blue cloth to her chest. "Arigato Hitsugaya-kun." She held it carefully to her chest, directly above her heart. To others, it may only be a simple haircloth, but to her, it was an important item because he had given it to her. She smiled at him, her full attention and joy directed at him and only him.

He felt his heart skip a beat at that smile. He hated how happy he felt from seeing that smile. He had lied to her; there wasn't any thought in that stupid piece of cloth because it hadn't been her intended gift. Bitterly he wondered how she would have smiled if he had given her the hair clip. "It's not a big deal. It's just a stupid piece of cloth."

She giggled at him. He always got so embarrassed so easily. "Well I love it," she held it above her head as if she was showing it off to the world. "The color is the same as your Hyōrinmaru, so that makes it extra special."

Her words sent a jolt through his heart and shudder down his spine. He hadn't even thought of that, but she was right. The cloth was the same ice blue as his Zanpakuto. He didn't know how this new knowledge made him feel.

"I'll be sure to wear it every day from now on," carefully tucking her new gift into her robes she grabbed his hand and guided him. "Now come on. I don't know about you, but I'm starving." She happily took the lead, and she pulled him along to one of her favorite restaurants.

For once Hitsugaya didn't care that she was dragging him along like some little kid. He let her do as she pleased. Looking down at their conjoined hands he fought back to keep the blush that was spreading across his cheeks maintained. Seeing her small delicate hand in his calloused one made him think and feel things he never allowed him to experience unless he was alone and didn't have to worry about others seeing him. Like right now all he wanted to do was tighten his grip on her hand and walk side by side with her. He wanted to interlock their fingers and hold her small, fragile hand tighter in his like the way he's seen others do when they go out for lunch together. But when the others went out for lunch, they were out as dates and not childhood friends. He treasured his years growing up with Hinamori, but sometimes he wonders if it put him at a disadvantage. Would she always see him as the little kid that used to spit watermelon seeds at her? He hadn't grown any taller, but his skills had developed and matured. He had graduated from the academy in only one year. He was prodigy when it came to intellect, fighting, and kido. He was the youngest recruit ever to enter the ranks of a Shinigami, and he was already starting his Bankai training. That had to mean something, didn't it? He had finally caught up with her; he had become a Shinigami like her and had become third seat officer of his division easily. So why did it feel like he still had a ways to go? Even with every accomplishment, he's achieved it still felt like she was so far away from him.

His free hand came up to hover over the spot where he kept the hair clip pinned inside his robes. While he was pleased to see how happy she was with the cloth he really wanted to see her reaction to the hair accessory. He felt his lips quiver into another frown but he wouldn't allow himself to sulk. This was just another bump in the road. If she still seemed so far away from his grasps, then he would just need to work harder. Eventually he would give the hair clip to her, but first, he needed to get stronger. He'll achieve his Bankai and have even better means to protect her. He'll get stronger so that his powers can match up with Aizen, maybe even more so. Once he's strong enough, he'll give it to her. Then perhaps he'll finally have the courage to tell her how he feels. But until that time he would keep the accessories with him.


	2. Chapter 2

It was a beautiful day in the Soul Society. Months had passed since the war, and there had many who thought peaceful days like this would never come again. In the end, they won the battle thanks to Ichigo, although the cost was high, everyone had been working hard to rebuild what was broken. The healing process was still going on for many of them, but they were all moving forward.

Hitsugaya Toshiro, captain of the Tenth Division, was one of those who was moving forward. If this war had taught him anything, it was that he was nowhere near strong enough to protect Hinamori. He let himself fall victim to Aizen's deception, and because of that, he ended up hurting the girl. He stabbed her in the chest, nearly killing her, and then instead of tending to her aid he rushed off like a fool and almost died himself. With the combined efforts of both the Fourth and Twelfth Division, the two childhood friends had recovered and returned to their duties.

Once Hinamori had been discharged and was deemed healthy enough to work, he had rushed to see her, to beg for her forgiveness. The whole time she was recovering he had been training nonstop to better his skills and gain more strength and power. He wouldn't fail her a second time. It shouldn't have surprised him that she didn't blame him for anything that happened and happily expressed how glad she was to see him alive and well. That was just how she was. She always put other's concerns before herself. Which is why he made up for it by putting her concern above his own. Her safety was the most important thing to him.

Sighing to himself he pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to help ease the dull headache that was starting to form. He had spent his break speaking with Hyōrinmaru, trying to better his bond with his Zanpkauto while also trying to come up with better training regimens together. If this war had taught him anything it was that he needed to hone his skills and have better control of his Bankai. He was a captain, having a Bankai was supposed to give him an edge of his opponents. It was supposed to be his most powerful form to aid him in defeating his enemies and protecting the ones he cares for. While he was able to obtain the power at a young age, he wasn't anywhere near close enough to adequately control it. If he wanted to keep his promise to protect Hinamori, then he needed to get stronger and to do so meant he needed to be able to use his Bankai properly.

So far his progress wasn't going as quickly as he hoped. He still wasn't at the level he was confident enough that he could protect Hinamori against any evil that may appear. While they were experiencing peace, no one knew when and if a new enemy would attack them. He needed to be ready if he was going to keep his promise. Unfortunately, this new time of peace didn't do anything to ease his share of paperwork. If anything it only increased it. They had a lot to do after the war, and the Seireitei was still recovering. They had been able to fill the captain positions with the previous captains who had been used by Aizen. The three Visoreds seemed friendly enough; he spoke mainly with Hirako than the other two, so he didn't know too much about them. Although in the beginning of his returning as acting captain Kira had been in his office drunk out of his mind and complaining about the long-haired blonde man and his odd behavior.

Thinking of the depressed lieutenant and the reason why he was drunk beyond comprehension only made his headache worse. Everyone knew who and where to go to if you needed a stiff drink during working hours and sadly that meant his office had become the hangout spot for many Shinigami. Sighing to himself he opened the door to his office, pleased that it was empty, but glared when he saw the sleeping form of his Lieutenant. He should have known that she would be like this although he continued to hope that one day she might surprise him and actually do her fair share of the work. _"Like that'll ever happen."_ He rolled his eyes at the thought and made his way towards his desk. She's been like this since he first joined the division and he doubted even the Soul King had the power to change her.

Light snores could be heard coming out of the strawberry blonde. Her once long wavy hair had been chopped off. It was shorter, stopping short of her shoulders and curling near her chin, the left side of which hangs over her face. She had come into the office one day with a new look, stating it was time for a change, but he knew better. After all, he was the same. He had changed his own look as well, or maybe it was more accurate to say he changed it back. His hair was styled like how it used to be when he first became a Shinigami, but he felt this was a good change for it. He was going back to the basics. During this whole ordeal with Aizen, he let himself become blinded with hate and focused only on ending his enemy. He nearly forgot that the entire reason he took up a sword was because he wanted to protect those he cared for.

Despite him being in the room and moving about Matsumoto didn't so much as stir. She was completely passed out. There weren't any empty bottles surrounding her, but he didn't doubt that she had a few drinks in her. Usually, he would yell at her to do some work the moment he walked in, but he would let her sleep a bit more. The war had only been a few months ago, barely enough time to recover and not nearly enough time to grieve. She didn't tell him what took place when she chased after Ichimaru and he didn't ask. That was her business, and if she didn't feel like sharing, then he wouldn't pry.

He was a gray area in the eyes of their superiors. No one knew whose side he was really on. Urahara had uncovered evidence that suggested the silver-haired man was really plotting against Aizen all this time but without him there to confirm these theories there was not much they could do. Central Forty-Six had other issues to deal with and didn't feel like wasting the resources to investigate the matter further, so they swept it aside. The case of Ichimaru Gin was forgotten.

He has never gone to see it, but he knew that Matsumoto had constructed a grave for him outside of the Seireitei. She would visit it during the middle of the night and be out there for longer than she would ever admit. She acted like she always did but they knew she was still healing. Hitsugaya didn't pretend to understand what she was going through and frankly, he didn't want to. He couldn't even begin to imagine what would have happened if Hinamori had died during the war. That would have been the end of him. She was his life, his very existence for living; he couldn't exist without her by his side. If she had died, then he would have as well. He loved her with every fiber of his being, and if he were ever to lose her, then he doubted he could go on.

Which is why he was cutting Matsumoto some slack and letting her rest despite the giant pile of paperwork with her name on it. He would let her sleep now since she obviously wasn't during the night and when he really needed her help, he would wake her.

That had been the plan, but the shrill ringing of her phone surprised them both. With failing arms Matsumoto woke up from her nap, looking bewildered as she tried to figure out where she was. When she caught the look of his frowning face, she gulped but flashed him a smile, hoping to ease whatever scolding she would get. "Rangiku speaking," she answered the phone, cutting off the loud ringing and offered him an awkward wave. All she got in return was a blank stare.

" _R-Rangiku-san,"_

The soft voice on the other end caught both their attention, mainly because of whom it belonged too. "Hinamori, what's wrong?" she sat upright; looking worried as she pressed the phone closer. She didn't have to look over to see that her captain was now focusing on her phone.

A sniffle was heard, along with a soft hiccup. _"I need your help…can you please-"_

" _Oi, Momo, get off the phone."_

" _No!"_

The line went dead; the two officers of the Tenth Division were left in silence after hearing the pleading from Hinamori and the scolding from her captain.

Not really sure what else to do Rangiku stood up. She wanted to check on her friend and make sure that she's okay. "Taichou, if you don't mind. I'm just going to check on Hinamori, and then I'll get started on work," she offered him a quick explanation but wasn't surprised to see that he was already pushing away from his desk and making his way towards the door. Smiling softly to herself she followed after him. She should have known that the moment Hinamori was heard crying on the other line that he would be rushing off to check on the girl.

It didn't take the two very long to reach the Fifth Division. If she asked him about it later, Hitsugaya would probably deny rushing towards the girl, but she had to use a bit of effort to keep up with the white-haired boy. Dashing past a few officers they made their way to Hirako's office, detecting both his and Hinamori's reiatsu from there. Without even knocking Hitsugaya threw open the door, his spiritual pressure spiking as he frantically searched for his childhood friend.

"Oh great," Hirako stood in the center of the room, arms crossed over his chest as he looked at the two that just entered his office. "This is exactly why I didn't want her to call."

Hitsugaya frowned, eyes scanning the office one more but he didn't see any signs of his friend. "Where's Hinamori?"

Hirako pointed behind him, where a thin arm appeared, waving at the two. "She's not gonna come out until you two close the door."

Although he still didn't know what was going on, he was at least glad to see that Hinamori was indeed in the office. Closing the door, the two Tenth Division officers stepped closer to the blonde. "Hinamori, what's going on?" he tried not to be bothered by the fact that the girl was all but clinging to her captain.

"You sounded really upset on the phone." Rangiku tried to look at her friend, but the girl kept shifting away.

Hinamori sniffed, chocked hiccups were easily heard, and it caused Hitsugaya to stiffen up. Glaring at the blonde, he pointed an accusing finger at the man. "What did you do?" he didn't know what happened here, but he had a strong feeling that this man was the cause of it.

Looking appalled at being accused Hirako scoffed and turned his head away from the young captain. "I didn't do anything. Momo is just being overly sensitive and – ow!" he yelped, clenching his now aching knee that his Lieutenant kicked.

"I am not being overly sensitive!" Momo cried out, her brown eyes glassy with unshed tears and a deep frown set on her face.

"Hinamori…" Rangiku and Hitsugaya stood in awe, mouths gaping open as they looked on at the young peach girl. "Your hair!"

Realizing that they were looking at her, Momo's hands flew up to her head, trying and failing to cover up the dark locks. "No! Don't look!" she cried, the tears building up more in the corner of her eyes. Her once shoulder length dark locks had been chopped off, reaching up to her chin. The hair had been cut straight-laced, looking more like a bowl cut than anything. Even her bangs had been trimmed, running evenly along her forehead. It was not a good look.

"I don't see what the big deal is," Hirako shrugged his shoulders, coming to stand beside the young girl. "Momo was telling me how she wanted to change up her look and I offered to give her a haircut. I think she looks pretty good." He said with a wide grin, clearly not seeing anything wrong with the new look he had given the crying girl. He picked up a strand of his blonde hair and a strand of her hair. "Look we even match!"

That comment was what broke the dam. "Rangiku-san!" Momo threw herself at the older woman, crying into her chest.

Feeling offended by her reaction that he deemed over the top Hirako opened his mouth to speak up but was quickly silenced by the menacing look he was receiving from Hitsugaya. Was it just him or did it suddenly get very cold in here?!

His anger was rising while the temperature was dropping. Logically he knew that Hinamori wasn't harmed, at least not physically, but her crying had never sat well with him. In his opinion, she had shed enough tears to last a lifetime, and he didn't want her to cry anymore. Stalking forward he gripped the collar of her captain and pulled him down to eye level. "Apologize to her right now." He growled through gritted teeth. It was taking all his self-restraint not to punch the older man in the face.

Hirako gulped, suddenly feeling very afraid and very cold. He's heard stories of the young captain's temper, but this was the first time he was experiencing it. "Momo, I'm really sorry. It wasn't my intent to make you cry. Please forgive daddy." He broke away from the kid's hold, trying to suppress the shiver that was running down his spine.

Sniffling softly Momo turned her head away from Rangiku's chest; glossy brown eyes looked directly at her captain. He did seem genuinely apologetic, and strangely a little fearful. Breaking away from the comforting hold of her friend she wiped away the few stray tears that lingered and offered the man a faint smile. "I forgive," she whispered.

Sighing in relief and returning her smile with one of his own Hirako stood up straight, feeling a lot better. "What do you say you take the rest of the day off? Go to a salon and get yourself a look that you'll love. My treat!" he pulled out a small pouch of coins and handed it to the young girl.

Hearing the jingle of coins and realizing a prime opportunity was in front of her Rangiku grinned like a cat and eagerly snatched up the pouch. "I know the best salon in the Seireitei. They'll treat you like royalty there, Hinamori," she hugged the young girl close to her. Shrugging off the pink scarf around her shoulders she wrapped it around Momo's head to cover up the haircut that left the poor girl in tears. "Taichou, if it's alright with you, I'll escort Hinamori to the salon and make sure everything turns out fine."

A little dazed from hearing the daddy comment Hitsugaya just nodded his head. "Yeah sure."

Not giving him a chance to second-guess himself Rangiku grabbed Hinamori by the hand and pulled her out of the office. "We'll see you, boys, later!"

"Geez," Hirako shook his head, a little impressed with how fast Rangiku got them out of there. He was well aware of the blonde and how she always ditched work to go drinking. Rose has told him plenty of stories how he caught her and his Lieutenant drinking in the middle of the day. "Women right?" he chuckled, butting shoulders with the boy. Or was it more accurate to say he butted his elbow against the young captain's shoulders. He held his tongue to prevent him from making a short comment.

Hitsugaya didn't find his comment funny and glared up at the man. "For your sake, this better be the last time you ever make Hinamori cry." It wasn't spoken outright, but the threat was there. He didn't want to hear that this man made his friend cry ever again. If he did, then he would surely regret it.

With that said, Hitsugaya made his way towards the door, and Hirako was left standing there with his mouth wide open and completely shocked. "Man, Momo never told me that she had such an overprotective boyfriend."

Hitsugaya stopped short, his fingers just brushing over the door handle when his entire body went rigid.

"Now that I think of it, she never mentioned having a boyfriend either," Hirako muttered, mostly to himself but the young man in the room still heard it. Brown eyes looked at the stiff form of the white-haired boy and were amused to see the tips of his ears were a bright red. "You two are dating, aren't ya? If not then I'd say what you said to me then was kind of an overreaction." He grinned, very amused by this sudden turn of events.

Turning around almost robotically Hitsugaya glared with all his might at the blonde captain. "Urasi!"

Hirako held back the urge to laugh. "You know, Momo is a real sweetheart, but she's a little dense so if you don't tell her how you feel then she'll never know."

Hitsugaya stiffened up once more, but this time it wasn't only because of his embarrassment. Not knowing what else to say he left, leaving the Fifth Division and headed back to his office. He still had work to finish.

Hirako sighed, "Oh well, you can't rush these things." Seems like the two still had some growing up to do when it came to matters of the heart.

* * *

The day came and went in a blink of an eye and Hitsugaya was drained. It had taken him most of the day to finish all the work that needed to be submitted by the end of the day. The sun was just starting to set, and it was close to dinner time but he found himself unwilling to move from his spot. For once he was the one sleeping on the couch in his office, in an attempt to fit in a quick nap, one of his many efforts to grow taller, before his stomach deemed it was time to eat. Only he found it hard to relax and fall asleep. He was too wired from working all day long and trying to get the paperwork finished. He should have realized that Rangiku was just using Hinamori as an excuse the goof off for the rest of the day, but he had been thrown off by the absurd "daddy" comment that Hirako had made. What kind of weirdo calls themselves the father of another person they've only known for a couple of months? At least he didn't have to worry about the man holding any romantic interest in the girl. He already had enough stress built up from that very scenario from Aizen, and he wasn't sure how much more his heart could take.

" _If you don't tell her how you feel then she'll never know."_

He groaned, rolling over onto his side. He hasn't had many encountered with Hirako Shinji, but in a matter of moments he had figured out his feelings for the girl. He knew that threatening the man like that over such a foolish thing was extreme, but when it came to Hinamori, he found it was hard to think straight. Acting in such a manner was a clear sign of his feelings for the peach girl, and the blonde captain saw through him instantly. But if it was so obvious then why was it that she had yet to figure it out? Was she really that dense?

With a low sigh, he sat up, knowing that no matter how hard he tried he wouldn't be able to fall asleep. He wasn't hungry, yet so he settled for drinking tea and just sitting there, relaxing and enjoying the silence that was so rare. Usually, his office was overrun with Matsumoto and her drinking buddies. Some days he wonders how he ever gets any work done.

Taking a long sip of his tea his mind brought him back to his childhood friend. Not that it was much of a surprise. She was usually the center of his thoughts. Years ago he promised himself that once he was as strong as a captain, he would confess how he felt. Well, now he was not only as a strong as a captain he was one. He was respected throughout the Seireitei, a prodigy they called him, but he didn't feel the same. So what if he had immense reiatsu? So what if he graduated from the academy within a year? So what if he became the youngest captain in history? None of that mattered out on the battlefield. He had failed her in the worst way possible. He vowed to protect her from harm, and his sword was the one that nearly killed her. Because he was too weak to fight against the hatred, he let himself fall under Aizen's spell, and he stabbed Hinamori. A hand flew up to cover his mouth as he choked back by the vomit that came up. Just thinking about it made him sick.

He was working hard to become stronger to keep his promise to protect her but did that mean he would still confess? For years he worked hard to block out the images of Hinamori being enamored with Aizen. It hurt seeing how brightly she smiled at the man when he wanted her to look that way at him. He had thought once he grew stronger she would recognize him as a man and finally stop seeing him as the little kid she grew up with. He still wanted that but did he deserve it? Did he have the right to ask her to love him after all he had done? Never in a million years would he ever intentionally hurt her but this past year with Aizen only showed him that he had a long way to go if he wanted to keep her safe. He gave her the letter that mentally berated her, making her turn against him and even caused him to raise his hand against her and knocked her out. He was too late to stop Aizen from stabbing her and nearly killing her. He had plunged his sword through her chest. It was his fault this time that she had been hooked up to all different kinds of machines as she fought for her life.

No, he didn't have the right to ask for her love in return. She had given him her forgiveness for hurting her, and that was all he would take. No more and no less. They were still friends, they still had their memories of childhood, they still had a deep bond, and that was all he would need. He didn't have the right to ask for anything more. They were childhood friends, and they would stay that way until the end of time. He would stop any romantic feelings that might take over his heart. He wouldn't let them blind him from keeping her safe just because of his selfish desires.

Jumping off the couch, he walked back over to his desk and opened one of the drawers. He's learned over the years that Matsumoto liked to use his desk to store her alcohol, but it seemed that she never figured out he had his own secret hiding spot. With a wave of his hand, he released the kido spell that kept the secret compartment he created hidden. Opening it up it revealed to him the few things he kept hidden from the rest of the world, things he considered private. Letters from Hinamori when she first entered the academy and a few from his Obaa-chan, his old spinning top from his childhood, and some photographs taken of him and Hinamori throughout the years. Matsumoto had a nasty habit of taking secret snapshots of them for her Women's Association, and he always caught her before she could print them to the public, but he kept a few of the photographs for himself. With shaking hands, he pulled out a small hairclip that sat in the center of the drawer. Sealing it back up he closed the desk drawer and returned to the couch, the hairclip in the palm of his hands as he stared at the small trinket. He's had this thing for nearly twenty years with the promise he would give it to her after he became stronger. In the time he's had this thing he's become a captain and grew up from the young third-seat officer he used to be. With a bitter smile, he chuckled to himself. This hair clip was a representation of how much of a coward he really was. After it came to light Aizen's true persona, he couldn't help but wonder if the man had seen him purchase the clip and purposely prevented him from giving her the hairclip all those years ago. It wouldn't surprise him if that were the case.

Things were so different back then. His focus was on getting stronger and proving himself as a capable man, but now he wasn't sure if he had the right to think of himself like that. He still wanted to remain by Hinamori's side until the end of their days, but now he would do so as just her childhood friend. He wouldn't allow anything to stop him from getting strong enough to protect her, and he would stay with her as "Shiro-chan" the young boy that grew up alongside her. He would be nothing more and nothing less. If anyone tried to say otherwise he would convince them that this was the way things needed to be. Even if that meant lying to his own heart.

"Hitsugaya-kun?"

Hinamori softly knocking on his door jolted him out of his thoughts. Shoving the clip into his robes he straightened himself out, taking in deep breathes to calm his racing hair. Clearing his throat, he answered her. "Come in." he hoped his voice sounded like it always did.

Slowly she opened the door, revealing herself to him as she shyly looked down at the floor. Her one hand twitched to touch the ends of her new short locks, but she stopped herself, making her cup her two hands together.

She seemed uncertain as she kept glancing his way, but he knew exactly what she wanted. "You look nice." His smile was genuine, and so was his compliment. Even with that atrocious haircut, her captain had given her he still thought she was the most beautiful girl he has ever seen. He gripped the fabric of his pants, mentally scolding himself for thinking such things when he already swore to give up on his feelings for her. He shouldn't be thinking of her in any romantic sense anymore. He didn't have the right too.

Hearing him say he liked her new look sent a relieved feeling throughout her. "Arigato," she beamed at him, happy to have his approval on her new look. Personally, the bob haircut the stylist gave her was much shorter than she would have ever chosen herself. Rangiku had been telling her that it was a good look, but she wanted the opinion of her friend to help reassure her. Closing the door to his office she came to join him on the couch. "I wanted to thank you for letting Rangiku-san help me out, and I came to see if you needed any help with work." She and blonde had spent more time at the salon than they initially thought. After prepping her hair, the stylist had to carefully trim and layer her hair that had already been cut very short.

"She never changes," Her concern for others always outweighs her concern for herself. He saw how nervous she was about her hair, but she was more worried about him completing his work than staying home and trying to fix her hair. "Let me guess, once you and Matsumoto left the salon she went to the nearest bar and is already drunk?"

"Well…" Momo didn't know what to say. On the one hand she didn't want to sell out her friend after she went to the trouble of helping her but on the other hand, he was spot on. The busty lieutenant was already drunk with their friends and wouldn't be returning to the office tonight.

Hitsugaya could only sigh and rub his temples. Just thinking about his lazy lieutenant gave him a headache. "I appreciate your concern, but Matsumoto is a grown woman who should be doing her own damn work," he crossed his arms and frowned as he looked at her desk that had two stacks of paperwork waiting to be completed. "And I plan to make sure she does them." he all but growled out, letting his anger and threat be known. Tomorrow he was going to freeze her to the chair so she couldn't run away and skip out on work again.

Momo let out an awkward laugh, silently reminding herself to warn her friend about her impending fate. Stifling a yawn, she stretched her arms above her head, and let out a pleased groan. "Today has been kind of crazy."

He scoffed, relaxing his shoulders but still kept his arms crossed. "When isn't it?"

She giggled, "That's true." She leaned back against the plush couch, a pleasant smile on her face as they sat there in silence. It's been a while since it was just the two of them like this. Casting a sideways glance at him her smile increased, her cheeks turning a light shade of pink. "I'm happy to hear that you like my haircut. Your opinion was the one I was the most worried about."

This caught Hitsugaya off guard. He didn't mean to, but his body stiffened up at her words, his head turning sharply in her direction so he could take her all in. He felt his heart skip a beat when he saw the faint blush on her cheeks

Seeing his reaction made her blush deepen, but she wouldn't let a little embarrassment deter her. If this past year taught her anything it was that time is short and she didn't want to go through life with any regrets. So that meant she would speak what's on her mind. "I had thought about cutting my hair short a couple of times. Granted I would never have cut it this short, but I had thought about changing up my style a few times over the past decade," reaching into her robes she pulled out a light blue cloth. The same one he had gifted to her all those years ago. "However if I did cut my hair then I wouldn't be able to wear this haircloth that you gave me," she brought the blue fabric close to her chest, directly above her heart. "I've loved this haircloth ever since you gave it to me and I'm disappointed I can't wear it anymore, but I promise to always keep it with me." She smiled at him, hoping that he saw just how much this cloth meant to her. This was special to her because he had given it to her. He gave her this present not because it was her birthday or another special occasion but because he had been thinking about her. To her, this cloth was a symbol of their bond. No matter how much time passed, they would always be in each other's thoughts.

Hitsugaya bit his lower lip as he gripped tightly to his arms. He was sure later on tonight he would find red marks on his skin from how hard he was clutching his arms, but he didn't care. Seeing her smiling like that, hearing those sweet words, being able to experience her kindness, it always caused this kind of reaction. His heart was beating out of control, making his mind shut down and filling him with a warmth that only she could do. He hated the heat. Ice was his home, and it was a part of him. But he was addicted to the warmth that she gave off. _"Hinamori, you don't play fair."_ He had to bite his tongue to keep from saying all the words he wanted to say. There was so much he wanted to tell her. Had this been over a decade ago he would have considered this a prime opportunity to confess his feelings but didn't he just swear he would forgo any romantic interest in favor or keeping her safe and happy? That had been his intentions, but not even he could anticipate just how strongly her smile could affect him. _"If you look at me that way it'll make it harder to give up on you."_ All he wanted to do right now was take her in his arms and confess all that he felt for the girl. He knew she didn't feel the same. While she may no longer feel enamored about Aizen she was still healing and entering a relationship was the last thing on her mind. Hinamori was an open book to him. While he has been hiding his emotions since childhood, she always showed her in her eyes. Her chocolate doe-like brown eyes told him all he needed to know. She still saw him as the little boy she grew up with. But he was amazed to see looking into those shining eyes that never once looked upon him with fear he saw that there was something new shining in them. Recognition.

He gulped at this. For years he's wanted her to recognize him as more than just "Shiro-chan," and it seems, at last, she finally was. She was starting to look at him as more than just some kid that used to spit watermelon seeds at her. Taking a deep breath through his nose and exhaling through his mouth he reached into his robes and pulled out the hairclip. Without giving himself a second to think about it he stretched out his arm, reaching across her to lock the clip into her soft raven locks. His fingers slowly caressed the hair that he often used to play with whenever she had fallen asleep before him when they still lived together. Their faces were only inches apart. If he wanted to, he could easily place his lips on top of hers, but instead, he leaned back and did his best to control his thumping heart. Had this been a decade ago he wouldn't have been able to do such a thing. He would have been too embarrassed and worried about his image. He always wanted to appear more adult. But he realized that he shouldn't care so much about how he looked and just start doing all the things he wanted. He didn't want to regret anything more in life.

Momo felt like her two cheeks were on fire. She never once expected Hitsugaya to do such a thing. For as long as she's known him he's always been too embarrassed to behave in such a manner. _"When did Shiro-chan grow up?"_ she was too embarrassed to say that's he found his sudden behavior change really cool. Reaching up she touched the clip he put in her hair. Taking out her phone she flipped open to the photo app to look at herself and smiled when she saw the accessory. "It's so kawaii. Arigato, Shiro-chan!"

He smiled, his eyes softening when she saw her continue to examine the clip. It was twenty years late, but he finally got to see her reaction, and it was exactly what he expected. "I'm glad you like it."

She nodded happily, one finger fiddling with the turquoise ribbon. "I match with your Zanpakuto again! I'm so happy." She still held her blue haircloth in her other hand. She had been upset when she realized she could no longer wear it, but now she had something new to remind her of her bond with her old friend. Deep in her heart, she still feared that the others were slowly forgetting about her and moving on but him presenting her with this hairclip told her that no matter what he would always be by her side. The thought of it made her heart flutter.

Hitsugaya was left with a bittersweet feeling in his chest. He was overjoyed at how happy she was, but he was still lying to her. Twenty years ago he had been too much of a coward to give her the hairclip, and the cloth that she treasured was just a cover-up. Knowing how much she loved the two items, he gifted her made him want to slap himself and hug her at the same time. Only she could make him feel such confusing things. _"I still have some growing up to do."_ He sighed to himself, letting himself relaxing into his couch as he sat there, perfectly content with watching her smile like that all night long. Just moments ago he had been more than ready to let go of his feelings, believing that it would be better for her and for him. But after seeing her smile like that he knew it was hopeless. Repressing his feelings would only put a distance between them, and that is precisely what happened with Aizen. He wouldn't allow that to happen ever again. If he was going to protect Hinamori properly, he needed to be more honest with his feelings. He loved her. He desperately, truly, and uttering was head over heels in love with her.

But he wouldn't tell her.

At least not yet.

The war had taken a toll on all of them, and they were still recovering. She was still handling the mental abuse she suffered from Aizen, and he still had to master his Bankai. He would take his time, letting his heart mature more and his skills increase before he told her how he felt. Who knows, maybe in the time to come that recognition of his skills in her eyes will develop into more? For the time being though he would enjoy moments like this.


End file.
